© Elliot Essman 2005. All rights reserved.

These pages contain the complete 2005 revised text of Building Yourself, public speaking trainer Elliot Essman's guide to living the successful life.

Elliot Essman Public Speaking Training
Building Yourself Table of Contents
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• Nothing is cheap which is superfluous, for what one does not need, is expensive at a penny. Plutarch (46–120 A.D.)

Millionaire number two has been driving the same Ford station wagon for the past seven years. This person has quite a reputation as an entrepreneur, but without the glamour image of millionaire number one. You don't have to worry about which fork to use at the restaurant millionaire number two invites you to—it's the local diner.

So which invitation do you accept? Why did fate have to drop such a difficult choice into your lap just now?

The choice isn't as hard as all that. Who do you think you would learn more from? Millionaire number two of course. Do you really want to know the details of number one's latest divorce battle? Does the noisiness, the showiness of number one really impress you?

I, for one, would rather sit and become really comfortable with millionaire number two at that diner. I'd keep my ears open and try to develop a relationship of trust. The ostenta­tion of number one turns me right off. At best, it's bluff and manipulation (and I don't want to be manipulated). At worst, it's a tremendous waste.

Don't misunderstand, millionaire number two lives well. But millionaire number two doesn't have to waste money impressing other people to fill some kind of personal void.

The point: ostentation and show don't make you rich. For every millionaire like number one, there are ten like number two. They live well, but quietly. They have everything they want, but have nothing to prove. They know what they have achieved. If other people want to waste their money to prove their status, let them. Status seeking is for losers. Frugality and saving are habits that lead to true financial freedom.

As your income increases, it's easy for your expenses to increase. You'll fall prey to living beyond your means, always hoping to catch up with greater achievements later. Your wants soon become your needs. If you're seduced by the notion of status, you'll find it very difficult to resist the urge to spend. If you don't put money aside, you'll never be able to multiply your income and your efforts. You should spend a good deal of your money—on living well. But there is a difference between spending money and wasting it. When you throw away money you throw away everything it grows into.