© Elliot Essman 2005. All rights reserved.

These pages contain the complete 2005 revised text of Building Yourself, public speaking trainer Elliot Essman's guide to living the successful life.

Elliot Essman Public Speaking Training
Building Yourself Table of Contents
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• Refuse to be ill. Never tell people you are ill; never own it to yourself. Illness is one of those things which a man should resist on principle at the onset. Edward Bulwar–Lytton (1803–1873)

Illness is like an annoying, spoiled child clamoring for attention. You just can't afford to give it that attention. Yes, you rest and make yourself better. But, no, you can't afford to get caught up in the psychology of illness or make it too great a part of your life.

Either you're health-oriented or you're illness-oriented. There's not much of a middle ground. Popular culture and the media show us both images, but the illness image is hammered home harder—in advertisements and commercials for common over-the-counter remedies. We're addicted to these: for stomach aches, headaches, coughs, colds, back pain and what have you. Most of these medications treat only the symptoms and not the causes of the illness. They do bring side effects. And you can come to depend on these products. They're patchwork solutions. Real health is something else.

The health orientation—the refusal to accept illness—means you use medicine, doctors, health care services, only when necessary. You get checkups of course, but, basically, you're in charge of your own body, not the doctor. If you get a headache, you lie down, massage your head, maybe take a hot bath or use a gentle herbal remedy. You won't get an upset stomach in the first place, since you understand your body and avoid foods you can't handle. If you do get a cold, you eat good foods and get plenty of rest. But you won't annoy everyone else with complaining, nor will you bankrupt yourself by buying silly medications that don't really solve anything for you.

The illness orientation calls for running off to the doctor for the slightest little thing—just because you're insured. Without thinking, if you get an ache or a pain you'll “take something for it.” There's a price attached to this—in negativity, in dependence, in losing touch with your body's real needs. What a horrible cycle: overeating, then pouring on gobs of antacids; or staying up all night, then taking a stimulant to wake up the next morning. There's much more to staying healthy than patching up every little hurt.

If you have the health orientation, you'll maintain your health with exercise, relaxation, proper nutrition. If you're illness-oriented, you're also failure oriented. You're sure to slide into every bad, negative, cynical, close-minded habit. You have control over all this. It's entirely your choice.